Mr. Wedel Completes School
Twice
Mr. Wedel, world
famous traveler has completed his studies at the University of Wisconsin
– Eau Claire for a second time in the span of 7 months a source close to
Wedel reports. After
graduating in May with a degree in Broadfield Social Studies, Mr. Wedel
unsuccessfully searched for a job over the summer months.
Two weeks before the start of the fall semester, he decided that he
would return to the University and continue his studies.
“I don’t know
what got into him” a disgruntled employee said, “he just up and left
us with all the work.” Friends
close to Wedel have reported seeing him around campus quoting Willy Wonka
and Red Green, but these reports cannot be confirmed.
According to the Wisconsin Department of Public Instruction
Website, Wedel has successfully applied for and granted certification in
the following areas: sociology, economics, and political science.
These are in addition to his previous certifications of social
studies, history and geography.
Mr. Wedel is reported
to be scheduling a press conference in the near future to officially
announce this information and the re-launching of WEDEL 1.
It Finally Snows
Feb 2, 2004
After weeks of waiting, the weather has finally
cooperated and the snow has begun. According
to a world famous Pennsylvania groundhog we can expect at least another 6
weeks of winter. |
The Bathroom Poll
From The Best of
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader
In 1991, the Scott
Paper Company did a survey to find out about people’s bathroom habits.
Here are a few of the highlights:
“You can gauge a
person’s education by whether they read in the bathroom. More than two-thirds of people with master’s degrees and
doctorates read in the stall, the survey shows. Only one in two high school grads read while in the bathroom,
and 56 percent of those with college degrees do.”
“Fifty-four percent
of Americans fold their toilet tissue neatly, while 35 percent wad it into
a ball before using it.”
“Seven percent of
Americans steal rolls of toilet paper.”
“More than 60
percent prefer that their toilet paper roll over the top, 29 percent from
the bottom. The rest don’t
care.”
Red Green
Says:
If the women don’t
find you handsome, they should at least find you handy.
Remember, I’m pulling for you; we’re all in this together.
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